Question:

Hello, tutor, I have had a crush on a girl for 2 months, but I feel like I have never been able to enter her field of vision. She treats me like a very ordinary person, which makes me sad. I don't know what to do.

She is from the human resources department. She was the one who recruited me when I applied for the job. The current situation is that I sit behind her and can see her every day. Then I send her a cup of coffee every Wednesday and Friday. I occasionally chat on WeChat, but I feel a bit indifferent. We talked to death yesterday, and I guess she also found out that I liked her, so she felt a little conflicted about it. There was no other communication about work matters.

How should I enter her field of vision step by step in this situation, attract her, change the current embarrassing situation, and successfully pursue her?

Answer:

Judging from your chat, the girl only said 2 sentences, but you said a lot, showing that you were relying on her. The feeling of chatting, if you do this many times, girls will slowly get bored of you. So you must pay attention to this and don't let girls think that you are a man who does nothing but chats.

Therefore, you must first control your sense of need and don’t talk to her too frequently in the near future. You can talk to her every two or three days.

Don’t do things that try to gain the other person’s approval, apologize with low-value explanations, or overly please. Because these behaviors will reduce your value and reduce your attractiveness.

Then increase your attractiveness and take advantage of you. For example, if you sit behind her, then work hard when you work. There is a saying that "men are most attractive when they are serious", and this is for sure. In short, you can't let her think that you are a man who has nothing to do and is unmotivated at work.

For example, if you deliver coffee to her every Wednesday and Friday, you don’t need to deliver it on Wednesday. Go do other things to enrich your life. Suddenly cut off the payment and see if she reacts. If there is a reaction, it will be beneficial to you. If there is no reaction, it means that the coffee has no meaning to her at all. Giving one away is just to impress her.

So, when you don’t go to deliver it on Wednesday, you can see if she will take the initiative to ask.

If she asks, then your opportunity to show it will come.

For example:

For example, on Wednesday, you don’t give it to her as usual. Deliver coffee. So if she asks "Didn't you come to work today?" at this time, she may actually mean that you didn't bring her coffee.

At this time, you can show it, and you can reply: "It may have to be delivered later, nowYou are still building eight-pack abs in the gym~"

At this time, girls can find that you are a positive person who loves life. , this is also one of the ways to attract a man who has requirements for you. Slowly, through such a display, you will give her a different feeling, discover more of your advantages, and she will naturally become interested in you. </ p>

Because you have had a crush on her for 2 months, she knows you well, and now you have to bring her a different feeling to attract her, so you can show a different you through the circle of friends , in essence, it also gives her a different feeling, discovers more of your advantages, and makes her curious about you.

You can also show that you are a motivated person in your daily chat interactions. He is a man who is thoughtful, mature, knowledgeable and independent, who can lead her, who understands her, and who is responsible, romantic, humorous and other qualities. This is also very important, because these qualities are the criteria for choosing a mate for girls. It is an important source of attracting girls.

Finally, take the initiative to invite her to advance the relationship. Having a crush will only leave opportunities to others, and you will miss many opportunities. After establishing attraction, you should take the initiative. .

In addition, you have known each other for such a long time, and you have enough familiarity and security, so you can take the initiative to ask her out and get closer to each other.

For example, ask her to have dinner, or go to an amusement park, or go to the movies, to cultivate the feeling that the two of you are together and increase your willingness to be alone. Time will allow your relationship to further escalate to an ambiguous relationship.

For example:

When you are chatting, you can vaguely invite her and say, "There is a new snack bar nearby." It’s pretty good. I’ll take you to have a big meal when I have time. ”

After completing these 4 steps, the relationship between you and her will be closer, and you will successfully enter her field of vision.

However, your situation will also take time, and it should be necessary. Make changes in about a month. Because your impression on her is somewhat solid at present, so it will take time to gradually adjust.

You just need to take your time, change step by step, and use the correct pursuit. Girls can catch her by attracting her.